Remembering Connor

Six years ago today my sweet Connor was welcomed into the splendor of Heaven by our Lord. I always struggle with how to remember him on a day that was so tragic, so painful and so very life-changing. In an instant, on October 31, 2003 my life stopped, and was never the same again. God has brought about healing and restoration in my heart and in the life of my family over the past six years yet on this day I still ache to hold my son. I long to gaze into his dark eyes and to feel his tender touches. I wonder what life would be like if he was still with us and I think about what he is doing in Heaven right now. My heart still hurts and I still ask the question, "why?". But despite the pain that still rears its ugly head occasionally I rest in the hope that I will one day see my baby's face again.

Yesterday I couldn't get the Mercy Me song "Homesick" out of my mind. I truly love the song for it expresses the cry of my heart as I think about being separated (temporarily) from my precious child. I thought that I would share the words of the song in case you haven't heard the song.

You're in a better place, I've heard a thousand times

And at least a thousand times I've rejoiced for you

But the reason why I'm broken, the reason why I cry

Is how long must I wait to be with you

I close my eyes and I see your face

If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place

Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow

I've never been more homesick than now

Help me Lord cause I don't understand your ways

The reason why I wonder if I'll ever know

But, even if you showed me, the hurt would be the same

Cause I'm still here so far away from home

I close my eyes and I see your face

If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place

Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow

I've never been more homesick than now

In Christ, there are no goodbyeAnd in Christ, there is no end

So I'll hold onto Jesus with all that I have

To see you again

To see you again

And I close my eyes and I see your face

If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place

Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow

Won't you give me strength to make it through somehow

Won't you give me strength to make it through somehow

I've never been more homesick than now

Giving thanks today that for those whose hope is in the Lord, there are no goodbyes!

With a heart that is near Heaven today,

Nichole

Happy Birthday to my Hubby!

Life has been beyond busy for us here at the Minot house and each week I tell myself that I am going to catch our blog up and then the week flies by with no blogging. I am hoping to use the weekend to post some pics of our recent activities and fun times. I decided to begin my catch up with a special post to my husband who celebrated his 50th Birthday last Tuesday.

I am truly blessed to call Mike my husband. Each year as well celebrate his birthday I am reminded of how precious he is to me and our children. There are so many things that I adore about him:

I love the way he loves Cody, Grace and Emily. There is nothing more beautiful than to see watch him with the kids.

His passionate love for the Lord has never faded and is an inspiration to me each day.

Mike's devotion and dedication to our family is always so evident in everything he does and the security that brings to all of us is beyond words.

He has such a tender heart and I love how he is so deeply emotional about those moments of life that most men would ignore.

I think that what I love about him the most is that he always encourages me to embrace and enjoy the simple things of life.

I am reminded of something Dory said to Merlin in the movie "Fi*ding Ne*o, " because when I look at you, I can feel it. And-and I look at you, and I... and I'm home." She also goes on to talk about how she is able to do things with Marlin that she can't do alone. That is how I feel about my husband...I am so much better with him than I am alone and I am so thankful that God gave him to me.

Happy Birthday to my Honey!